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My physical disorder was eating my life bit by bit…

“For many years I was feeling down but refused to take any medications. I thought I can fight low mood by myself. I thought it is un-natural to let chemistry work for myself. When my physical disorder started to progress and when I got pregnant everything went down the hill. Instead of enjoying pregnancy, instead of loving my baby, I was thinking about senseless of my life. My physical disorder was eating my life bit by bit. I was able to do less and less things which I was used to. Before I was very athletic – swimming for miles and running for miles. Now, I hardly walked and I was not able to hold my baby in hands because my shoulders and back hurt. I did not want to live. I thought that my physical disorder and my depression are absolutely separate things – that I should use medications only to treat my physical body, not my brain.

When I talked to Guruatma, she encouraged me to try anti-depressants. I was so tired of all my life that I gave up my fight and started to use them. Now, one year is gone. My baby boy had his first birthday. And only now I start to feel something, I start feel love to my baby and love to my partner. I could not believe that medications like antidepressants can do such a things with me. They returned me positive feelings. After years in a darkness I can enjoy my life despite my physical disorder.”

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